I’ve been exercising daily, and sometimes it messes up with my diet. I am burning more energy than my body is willing to and capable of supplying, so it’s been screaming for proteins and carbs, loads and loads of carbs. On an odd day, I would go home and eat 1/3 of a jar of peanut butter strict from the bottle. De.li.ci.ous….yeah sounds gross. By the way, peanut butter and apple, yummy.. the best snack ever. Nathan would come home from school and ask for it, thinking it’s his best treat of the day.

I love food, I love to eat. It is in my blood. Come on, haven’t you noticed my last name? Go get a can of pet food if you have no idea what I am talking about.

While trying to maintain a healthy diet, measuring and calculating how much I’ve eaten and what I can eat. I somehow forgot the balance.

One day a friend told me, “Go and fix your eating disorder.”

I took his word and I went home, ate a whole bag of popcorn and a whole pack of strawberry. That certainly felt fulfilling.

I used to love Korean food. I’d have been a die-hard vegetarian if there were no such thing called Korean BBQ short rib, rice and kimchi. But over time, I developed a symptom towards it, the je regrette beaucoup de choses symptom. While my taste buds love the stimulation of spicy food and the favorably marinated meat, my stomach protests it and my body resents it. While I enjoy eating it at the time, I regret what I’ve done a couple hours later in the day, or even the next morning.

I just wish I didn’t do it.

There are many things in life, I wish I had not done it. Things that may sound like a good idea at the moment but in hind sight, they are like a bad meal that I wish I had not harassed my body/mind to take in. Even worse, it takes time to cleanse. In fact, it takes thyme and time.

So, no.. I don’t regret a thing but I regret many things.

(more…)

The story goes and it’s true I was made for you.

As I typed out the title, I giggled.

Pour ma Emma (For my Emma) but in Cantonese it sounded like “婆媽”, meaning someone who’s sort of slow in making decisions (am I right?). Well the Emma I know isn’t like that, just to reassure you.

Couple Fridays ago, I “Whatsapp” her, “Emma, I miss you.”

“For all those nights I had to stay late in the lab, you would call me out for dinner and we have food waiting for me at the table while I tried to start one more PCR before stumbling out of the door, rushing to the restaurant.”

She said, “And I will call you out for breakfast too! “smilie””

Thank you, my dear friend. And just to let you know, I am available for lunch today, I have …like 30 min..

🙂

(more…)

Cloud

I found two albums of mine from 10 years ago. Much has changed over the years. It has been a roller-coaster ride journey and it’s been shocking, exciting and rewarding. Looking at the young woman with such magnetic smile on her face, I thought she probably didn’t know where she’d be nor where would she have been in the coming 10 years. Did she go from point A to point B, straight as it was planned and wished? If I were to give her my two pennies advice, I probably would have changed her journey. I would have reassured her no matter which direction she goes, she will find a path to get out of the cloud. And that’s what I am going to do, I am going to ask the Me in 6 months, 1 year, 5 years and 10 years later, what exactly do I need to do in order to get to where I’d be at by then?

(more…)

This is the first day of my life
I swear I was born right in the doorway
I went out in the rain suddenly everything changed
They’re spreading blankets on the beach

Yours is the first face that I saw
I think I was blind before I met you
Now I don’t know where I am
I don’t know where I’ve been
But I know where I want to go

And so I thought I’d let you know
That these things take forever
I especially am slow
But I realize that I need you
And I wondered if I could come home

Remember the time you drove all night
Just to meet me in the morning
And I thought it was strange you said everything changed
You felt as if you’d just woke up
And you said “this is the first day of my life
I’m glad I didn’t die before I met you
But now I don’t care I could go anywhere with you
And I’d probably be happy”

So if you want to be with me
With these things there’s no telling
We just have to wait and see
But I’d rather be working for a paycheck
Than waiting to win the lottery
Besides maybe this time is different
I mean I really think you like me

(more…)

Thanks you and good job on landing your feet firm on the ground 🙂

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